Shadows of Your Heart
by Cheeky Slytherin Lass
Summary: Eight non-linear and unrelated Kingsley drabbles and oneshots.:: 1. Past KingsleyAntonin 2. KingsleyPercy 3. KingsleyTonks 4. KingsleyAmelia
1. Healing

_Tangled Web: KingsleyAntonin_

 _Word Count: 634_

* * *

It takes every ounce of control for Kingsley not to lash out when he opens the door. He thinks he might have been able to face _any_ other war criminal, but not this one. His heart aches as he tucks his wand away.

"Kingsley." Antonin's lips tug into a too-bright smile. "I hear you're acting as Minister. Congrats."

"Do not provoke me," Kingsley warns.

He wonders if Antonin can see through him. Kingsley has spent years trying to build his reputation as a strong Auror, but Antonin had known him before that. Antonin knows him more intimately than anyone else ever could.

Almost grudgingly, Kingsley sits across from his former lover. He shouldn't even be here; he isn't an Auror anymore, and this shouldn't concern him as the acting Minister. Still, when Dawlish had come to him with news of a captured Death Eater who would only speak to Kinsley, he hadn't even hesitated. Maybe this is all he'll ever be–just a man seeking adventure and living for the thrill of adrenaline rushing through his veins.

Why does it have to be Antonin?

"Provoke?" the other man echoes with a laugh. "Aren't you a grumpy one today?"

Kingsley takes a deep breath. "You killed someone I cared about!"

He hasn't been able to shake the image of Remus' corpse from his mind. Remus had been a damn good man, and Kingsley had looked up to him.

Of course this doesn't seem to bother Antonin. His dark eyes sweep over Kingsley's figure, and he smirks. "You cared about me once," he reminds him. "Would you be this angry over _my_ death?"

Kingsley looks away. He doesn't have time for this.

"I think you would. You can act all high and mighty, but you're still you," Antonin continues. "It would kill you."

He wishes he could deny it, but Antonin is right. It doesn't matter how corrupt Antonin is. Kingsley had given him his heart, and that sort of connection doesn't just go away. Despite how much time has passed and how far apart they have drifted, Kingsley still loves him.

"Tell me I'm wrong." Antonin laughs, and the sound is so victorious, like he's made some profound discovery. "You can't, can you?"

Kingsley finally looks up, and his stomach seems to tangle painfully. Why does everything have to fall apart? Why can't he have some fairytale ending where things will work out against all odds? In another life, maybe he and Antonin could have had a future. Maybe he could have found a way to keep Antonin from joining the Death Eaters.

But this isn't another life. This is here and now, and nothing Kingsley can do can change things.

With a sigh, he climbs to his feet. "Cooperate with the Aurors," he says, keeping his tone steady and strong, "and I might be willing to negotiate a lighter sentence for you."

The arrogance fades from Antonin's face. He leans forward, dark brows knitting together in confusion. "Just gonna walk away? After everything?" When he laughs now, there is no amusement in it. He sounds panicked, desperate. "I thought…"

"You were right," Kingsley says. "If you died, I would be angry. But you aren't dead, and I'm not grieving for." He takes a deep breath and holds his head high. "There will always be some part of me that loves you, but I will not be a slave to it. Cooperate, or don't. I've made my decision. Make yours."

Before Antonin can protest, Kingsley turns and walks away. It hurts so damn bad, but he knows it will be okay in the end. Their love hadn't been made to last, but he's held on for so long, and it's been hurting him. It's time to let go and figure things out.

It's time to heal.


	2. Whispers

_Tangled Web: KingsleyPercy_

 _Word Count: 612_

* * *

Kingsley feels his cheeks heat when he hears the idle gossip. Working in a place as large as the Ministry, he's all too familiar with the way rumors fly left and right, like everyone is the most interesting person ever. Unfortunately, as the Minister, any rumors about him _are_ particularly interesting.

"I hear Weasley was shagging Shacklebolt in his office," Veronica Corner says with a laugh.

"No!" Josh Rey shakes his head. "Blimey. They seem close, but… Do you really think they would?"

"Dunno. That's what Ethel down in maintenance told me. She heard it from Urquhart."

Kingsley slips past, grateful that no one seems to notice him. Eventually, he will have to defend himself against these rumors, but, for now, he does not have the energy. Let them talk. It's only human nature for them to be curious.

…

"You wanted to see me?"

Percy stands in the doorway, and Kingsley swallows. For a moment, he forgets exactly why he had summoned Percy. Kingsley clears his throat, nodding and gesturing the younger man forward. "Close the door behind you."

He idly wonders if that's the best command to give. Bloody rumors. Now he can't help doubting himself.

They haven't done anything wrong. While they _have_ spent quite a bit of time together in his office, it had been strictly business. When the two of them had started dating, both had agreed it would be best to keep work and personal lives separate. In private, he had joked about how fun it might be to fool around in his office, but it had been a joke. He doesn't know how anyone could even suspect them of being involved. They aren't particularly affectionate.

"Is something wrong?" Percy asks, taking a seat across from him. "You look tense."

Kingsley snorts. _Tense_ is an understatement. He shakes his head and scrubs his palm over the back of his neck. "There are rumors going around."

"Ah." Percy's crestfallen expression is enough to break Kingsley's heart. "I was hoping those wouldn't make it this far."

Not the response Kingsley had expected. He rests his hands on the desk, watching his lover curiously. "You didn't have anything to do with it, did you?"

Percy's cheeks darken to a pink so bold it swallows his freckles. "Of course not!" He awkwardly adjusts his glasses. "I didn't want you to find out because I was afraid of what it would mean for us."

That makes more sense. Kingsley stares down at his hands, feeling ridiculous. How could he even imply that Percy might have had a hand in spreading the rumor? He has proven himself to be nothing but loyal. "Right. Sorry. I'm just a bit on edge."

Most rumors are harmless enough and die out fairly quickly. But this? Kingsley is the Minister of Magic, and the rumor is personal. He doubts it will fade any time soon.

"We're okay," he assures Percy. "I'm not breaking up with you just because someone has nothing better to do than run their mouth."

Percy looks visibly relieved at that. Poor bloke. This must have really upset him.

"We'll be more careful," Kingsley adds. "After this, no more private meetings during work hours. Bring your assistant, if you need to."

Percy nods. "Understood."

It isn't ideal, and Kingsley doesn't really like it, but he doesn't see another way. He and Percy have spent three months slowly building this together. There's no way he's going to let silly gossip destroy it.

"We're going to be okay," Kingsley says, nodding to himself.

Percy stands. "Of course we will."

The rumor will die eventually. Until then, Kingsley refuses to let it interfere with his happiness.


	3. Hope

_Tangled Web: KingsleyTonks_

 _Word Count: 521_

" _Good news is rare these days, and every glittering ounce of it should be cherished and hoarded and worshipped and fondled like a precious diamond."_

 _-Hunter S. Thompson_

Kingsley knows he's being ridiculous. He's never put this much effort into his appearance before, and maybe there's technically no reason to do so now, he's still stressing as he stares in the mirror, looking for even the smallest thing that can tidied up.

"I am my own worst enemy," he mutters, shaking his head and taking a step back.

He's done so much already: plucked stray hairs from his brows, clipped his nails, softened the rough patches on his hands. This should be enough. Why doesn't it feel like it is?

This isn't his first date, but it's the first time he's gone out with anyone since the dark shadow of war began to creep up on them. Maybe that's why he wants things to be as perfect as possible. Everything is falling apart, and the constant feeling of dread hangs over their heads, but there is something good out there, and it is so precious. How can Kingsley do anything other than cherish his one glimmering hope.

"Everything is fine," he tells himself as he smooths out a crease in shirt.

…

"You look nice," Tonks says brightly, offering him a smile. She rushes forward but nearly trips over her own feet. "Oops."

Kingsley chuckles as he steadies her. "I've got you," he says.

Tonks looks up at him, cheeks glowing a warm pink. She pulls away and pushes a hand through her signature bubblegum pink spiked hair. "Beautiful evening for a stroll," she says. "I figure maybe we can walk along the river then make our way to that little cafe. They have the best doughnuts and coffee."

"Sounds perfect."

Tonks links her arm in his, leaning in and resting her head against his shoulder as they walk. "You're easy to convince," she teases. "I like you."

…

The night is perfect, and Kingsley wants to laugh. Why had he been so worried about this date? He's known Tonks for years. How could this date be anything but magnificent?

Walking with her, talking about anything and everything… It's the most at peace he's felt in a year.

"You're staring," Tonks says as they walk through the park, gripping their coffees and baked goods. "Have I got sugar on my face?"

Kingsley shakes his head, grinning. "Just thinking about how lucky I am."

And he means it. In spite of all the darkness and chaos around them, they have found the start of something pure and good. Moments like this are far too rare nowadays.

Tonks grins. "Yeah," she agrees, nodding. "You are pretty lucky."

Kingsley snorts and rolls his eyes. Sometimes he forgets exactly how cheeky Tonks can be. He finishes his last doughnut and wraps an arm around her. "I know."

She moves in closer. If they were laying on a couch, it might be considered cuddling. "I'm lucky too."

Things seem to be getting worse as time goes on, but Kingsley thinks that maybe it will be okay. There's hope for them after all.


	4. Reminders

_Tangled Web: KingsleyAmelia_

 _Word Count: 743_

* * *

" _You know how inappropriate this is," Amelia murmurs as she locks the door behind them. "I'm your boss, for Merlin's sake."_

 _Kingsley laughs. "More than that."_

 _It isn't fair that they're suddenly expected to drop everything simply because she's been promoted. They've been lovers for too long, and Kingsley can't bring himself to just give that up._

" _Is it inappropriate to flirt with you?" he teases._

 _Amelia chuckles and shakes her head, slipping out of his grip. She offers him an amused smile. "You have more on your mind than just flirting," she says, fingers fidgeting with the pale pink stone in her necklace. "We shouldn't…"_

 _He grins and leans in, stealing a quick kiss. "I know. That's what makes it fun."_

 _He's all talk, of course. At the end of the day, he would never cross any lines. Still, teasing her is too fun. Kingsley loves the way she blushes and becomes flustered so easily._

" _Get back to work," she says with a laugh. "That's an order."_

Kingsley stands in the empty office, his heart heavy. Amelia should be here, but she will never sit in that seat again.

He swallows dryly and walks around. No one has cleaned it out yet. Kingsley supposes her brother will be by soon enough. Somehow, it just feels wrong to know that her things will be taken away.

"I miss her too."

He looks over his shoulder, surprised. John hadn't made a sound when he'd come in. His lips quirk, but Kingsley can't bring himself to smile. "What do we do?"

John moves closer, standing at Kingsley's side. "Is there anything we _can_ do? I mean, aside from finding the bastards who did this."

There's that, of course, but it isn't enough. Kingsley wonders if anything will ever be enough to make things feel even halfway okay again.

John rests a hand on his shoulder. "Get some rest, mate."

...

" _You look absolutely beautiful," he says, watching as Amelia places freshly-picked flowers in the vase on the dining room table._

 _She looks up at him, grinning. "Oh?" Amelia steps forward, reaching out for him. "I haven't changed anything."_

" _Exactly. You always look beautiful." He holds her close, leading her in a slow dance in the middle of the dining room. There's no music, but he doesn't need it. "I was thinking maybe we could go to Paris next weekend. What do you think?"_

 _They always make plans, but it always falls through somehow. By now, Kingsley thinks it's almost like an inside joke between them. If they don't plan some extravagant escape, something isn't right._

This house feels colder without her. Kingsley sits at the table, his stomach tying itself into painful knots. The flowers have wilted and died, but he can't bring himself to throw them out.

He holds a photograph in his hands. Amelia looks up at him, smiling and laughing. Though she had such a stern persona at work, Kingsley had known the real Amelia. There had been countless days of laughter and joy.

And now that's gone.

"We should have gone to Paris," he sighs. "I regret that."

He's spent so much time trying to be strong, but he's breaking down. It hurts too much, and everything reminds him of her.

Kingsley slumps forward, his cheek resting against the photograph. He has to find his strength. It's what she would have wanted.

…

" _Are you happy?" he asks as they sit together, enjoying their wine._

 _Amelia glances up from the book that rests in her lap. "Incredibly," she answers. She never has to pause or think; Kingsley has always loved that about her._

 _He leans back, lifting his glass to his lips and sipping. "Good," he says when sets the glass aside once more._

"I think you would be happy," he tells the photograph as he reaches the Eiffel Tower. "Paris is beautiful, but it would have been better with you here."

He sets the photograph at the base of the tower and pauses. They had so many big plans. Maybe, if the world hadn't been so cruel, they could have had a chance to make them happen.

For now, all Kingsley can do is make those trips on his own, leaving photos of the woman he loved at each monument. If only she could have been here while she was alive. However, Kingsley is content to honor her memory now. He will carry her in his heart, and he will live.


	5. Better

_Tangled Web: KingsleyHarry_

 _For Bex_

 _Word Count: 479_

* * *

Kingsley hates seeing Harry like this. It isn't just that he's upset over Harry being sick, it's the fact that his boyfriend is a stubborn pain in the ass, and Kingsley is on the verge of losing his mind. Still, he puts on a good act. The last thing he needs is for Harry to think he's getting upset.

"How's your head?" Kingsley asks as he sets the potion vials on the bedside table.

"Hasn't had any complaints."

Kingsley rolls his eyes. "Clever." It's good to know that this virus hasn't taken away Harry's sense of humor. "Let's check your temperature. Ah. Fever isn't quite broken yet."

That's been the worst part of all of this. The fever will fade, and there will be the faintest glimmer of hope… And then it will return within the hour, and the process will begin all over again. The Healers have sent him some potions to try, but it's starting to feel hopeless. Nothing seems to help, and he's so tired of seeing Harry suffer.

"I'm fine, Kingsley," Harry says, sitting up. He sways and wobbles slightly before collapsing again with a miserable groan. "You worry too much."

Kingsley doesn't bother to try and humor him anymore. The first day of this sickness, he had indulged Harry and bickered playfully with him. Now, after a full twenty-four hours of sitting vigil by his bedside and doing everything he can to help Harry get better, Kingsley doesn't have the energy left.

"I have an important case!" Harry insists. "The thing in Essex!"

"Yes," Kingsley agrees, ruffling Harry's dark hair affectionately. "You also have a team of trained Aurors who are perfectly capable of dealing with it while you're out sick. Now, are you going to keep being difficult, or are you going to cooperate?"

For a moment, he thinks Harry might argue further. Really, Kingsley wouldn't be surprised. Instead, the younger wizard huffs and props himself up slightly. "Fine."

Kingsley selects a dull yellow potion from the mix and takes off the lid. It doesn't smell pleasant, but he hopes Harry won't notice. "Open."

Harry does. Kingsley presses the vial to his lips, carefully tipping it into his mouth. Harry makes a face but swallows before sinking back into his pillow. "Not so bad."

Kingsley raises his brows. "Was it really not so bad?" he asks skeptically. "Or are you just saying that?"

Harry smiles sheepishly. "It tasted like rotten eggs."

Kingsley chuckles and pulls the blanket up, gently tucking his lover in. "I'll be back with some ice cream," he says. "See if that gets the taste out of your mouth."

He doesn't know if it will be enough to make Harry better, but Kingsley isn't giving up. They have made promises to care for one another through the good and the bad, and he has every intention to keep that promise.


	6. Chances

_Tangled Web: KingsleySeverus_

 _Word Count: 486_

* * *

Kingsley doesn't know why he bothers. He and Severus aren't exactly close, and Severus has been nothing but hostile since coming to the Order meetings. Kingsley doesn't owe him anything.

Still, when the meeting ends and Severus rises before anyone else and hurries out, Kingsley is right behind him. Sirius catches his eye, silently asking what the hell he's doing, but Kingsley ignores him. All he can think about is reaching the other man.

"You know," he says, catching up easily, "you really ought to stay. Molly didn't prepare anything special. Just sandwiches, soup, and the best damn cake you'll ever taste."

Severus keeps his back to him. "And why would I want to stay?" he asks, his tone sharp and cold. "Name one person in that bloody meeting that _wants_ me there, other than Dumbledore."

"I do."

He doesn't know _why._ There's something about Severus that intrigues him. Maybe it's the fact that Severus always seems to try to go unnoticed, or the fact that he isn't the type of person Kingsley _should,_ but he can't help it.

Severus turns, dark eyes widening in surprise for just a flicker of a moment. He regains composure and scowls. "Am I meant to be impressed?" he asks, waving a dismissive hand. "One lone person wants me to stay. Marvelous."

Kingsley chuckles and shakes his head. "And yet you're still here," he points out. "I think you want to be accepted, but you're too insecure to let people try to love you."

Severus inhales sharply, nostrils flaring. It seems that Kingsley has hit a nerve. Good.

"Who would even want to love me?"

"I would." Kingsley is surprised by his own words. Maybe that's what this has been about this whole time. It isn't just simple curiosity that draws him to Severus, but something more. The sentiment is out there now, and there's no going back. Kingsley holds his head high. "Stay and eat with us. It will be fun."

"Your faith in me astounds me." Severus shakes his head, swallowing dryly. "Black and I will murder each other if we are together longer than actually necessary."

"Then have dinner with me tonight."

Silence. Kingsley watches without a word as Severus seems to battle with himself. An array of emotions flicker over the other man's face until he finally sighs and slumps slightly. "Why would you want that?"

"Do I have to have a reason?"

Severus glances up. "I suppose not," he says.

Kingsley taps his foot impatiently. "Is that a yes?"

Severus doesn't look particularly happy, but he doesn't protest. "I can think of worse ways to spend my evening. Now, if you'll excuse me."

When Severus is gone, Kingsley smiles to himself. He doesn't know what has come over him or why he wants this, but he isn't turning back now. It's a new adventure, and he can't wait to see what life has in store.


	7. Stuck

_Tangled Web: KingsleyRosmerta_

 _Word Count: 358_

* * *

Kingsley can't stop staring at the ring on Rosmerta's finger. It looks so perfect.

For so long, he had assumed he would be a bachelor until the end of his days. It had never bothered him. Kingsley has always loved being alone and keeping a close circle.

And then Rosmerta had entered his life and had gradually become so much more than just the pretty barmaid he could chat and laugh and flirt with. He hadn't expected to fall in love with her, but life has always had a funny habit of doing whatever it pleases. In the end, Rosmerta had stolen his heart, and he can't imagine turning away.

"What? Is there something on my face?" she asks quickly pulling her compact mirror from her pocket and examining her reflection for some imperfection that isn't there.

Kingsley chuckles and shakes his head. "You look perfect," he tells her, leaning in and pressing a gentle kiss to her lips. "As always."

Rosmerta's fair brows knit together, and her lips purse as she studies him. Kingsley resists the urge to roll his eyes. For some reason, she always seems reluctant to accept a compliment from him, which is ridiculous since they're married now. He ought to be able to tell his wife how beautiful she is without her skepticism.

"Don't you dare argue with me," he laughs, reaching out and stroking her honey blonde hair.

"If you didn't want me arguing with you, maybe you shouldn't have put that ring on my finger." With a smirk, she lifts her hand and wiggles her fingers as if to show off the ring in question.

Kingsley grins. "I can't think of anyone else I would rather spend an eternity arguing with."

They've had their ups and downs, but she is the only one for him. He would rather spend a full day with her, bickering and arguing endlessly, than a day of peace and silence with anyone else.

She moves closer and pressed against him, her head resting on his chest. "Good. Because you're stuck with me now."

Kingsley wraps his arms around her. "I wouldn't have it any other way."


	8. Grief

_Tangled Web: Kingsley &Molly _

_Word Count: 530_

 _This was originally going to just be 8 fics, but I might keep going because Kingsley is love._

* * *

He stands by Molly's side as the watch Arthur's coffin be lowered into the ground. Kingsley wants to say something, but the words seem to stick in his throat, choking him. All he can do is rest a hand on Molly's shoulder and nod.

It isn't enough. Nothing could ever express how sorry he is, how much he wishes Arthur could be there with them. But it's all he has to give.

…

He stops by to visit. Molly doesn't really acknowledge him at first. She offers him a smile before returning to her cleaning.

"It was Arthur's turn to wash the dishes," she tells him. "He always forgets."

"Oh, Molly."

…

Cleaning seems to be the only way that she can cope. Molly is lost and afraid, and Kingsley suspects this is her way of trying to escape. Some right their grief with drugs or alcohol and allow their altered minds to take them away from the real world. Molly, on the other hand, throws herself into household chores, as if it will be enough to put the war on hold and bring Arthur back.

"Let me help you."

Kingsley has never been particularly skilled at domestic spells, but he has to help. It's the smallest possible gesture, but it's something.

"Thank you," she softly.

He isn't sure what to do. He lifts a moneybox and sets it aside so that he can wipe away the dust.

"I miss him," Molly says.

Kingsley nods. "Me too."

…

One day, not long after Arthur's death in battle at the Department of Mysteries, Molly finally breaks. Kingsley is there, helping her tidy up, as he always does, when she sobs suddenly.

He holds her because it's all he knows to do. He cannot take away her pain, but he can help her fight.

"Everything feels so hopeless," she says, trembling.

"Shh… Life is unpredictable. Not everything is within our control." Kingsley closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. Arthur should be here. Molly is too good and pure, and she should not be going through this trauma. "But as long as we're with the right people, we can handle anything."

He doesn't know if it will help. Things are getting worse, and the Dark Lord's forces seem to grow stronger, and everything is falling apart. In the end, this may not matter at all. But Molly relaxes, and he thinks maybe there's hope.

"What do I do?" she asks, pulling away.

Kingsley offers her a shaky smile. "Get the cookies. I'll finish cleaning in here."

"What good will cookies do?"

He shrugs. "Dunno, but I don't see how they could hurt." He reaches out and rests a hand on her shoulder. "You're not alone, Molly, and you don't have to do this by yourself, okay? Let me help you."

She nods, though she doesn't seems so sure. Still, she heads to the kitchen, and Kingsley visibly relaxes. It's going to be a long road, and he isn't sure that Molly will ever quite get over her grief. At least they've made some progress.

He means it. They will get through this, and she will not have to endure it alone.


End file.
